


Fairy Tail Chats!

by orphan_account



Category: Fairy Tail
Genre: Chatting & Messaging, F/M, Fluff and Crack, Gen, Post-Alvarez Teikoku | Alvarez Empire Arc, Silly, Usernames
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-12-29
Updated: 2019-01-05
Packaged: 2019-09-30 02:50:39
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 4,554
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17215607
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: StingyBee: Welcome to hellEmo: Glad to be here.tHuNdErThIgHs: Thank you. 4am is not the time for despacito.Smartie: If it’s not 4am when is the right time?IronMan: Not 4am.Smartie: ugh fine.FreakinElsa: H E L PStarGirl: JUVIA IS HURLING HERSELF OFF OF A BUILDINGBubbleHead: Juvia’s last words: Juvia wishes Ichiya didn’t exist.StarGirl: There you have it folks.Natsu made a group chat!StarGirl: Yay -_-Prepare for madness.Filled with shipping, roasts, puns and more! This is the Fairy Tail Chat! (also available on Wattpad and Fanfiction.net





	1. And So it Begins

**Author's Note:**

> Hope you like my story!

_ Natsu Dragneel has started a group chat _

_ Natsu Dragneel has added Lucy Heartfilia, Gray Fullbuster, Happy, Erza Scarlet, Mirajane Strauss, Gajeel Redfox, Levy Mcgarden, Wendy Marvell, Juvia Lockser, Carla, Lily, Laxus Dreyar, Freed Justine, Lisanna Strauss, Evergreen, Bickslow, Elfman Strauss, Sting Eucliffe and Rogue Cheney to the chat. _

Lucy Heartfilia: What the heck.

_ Natsu Dragneel has changed the group chat name to Mage Gang YeEt _

_ Natsu has changed his name to FireDragon _

Lucy: Oh god. Plz don’t change my name Natsu!

_ FireDragon has changed Lucy’s name to Keygirl _

KeyGirl: Hey that’s not that bad :)

_ FireDragon has changed Gray’s name to FreakingElsa _

_ FireDragon has changed Happy’s name to NotAlwaysHappy _

NotAlwaysHappy: EXCUSE ME NATSU? I AM HAPPY

FireDragon: Yeah, look at you right now.

_ FireDragon has changed Erza’s name to kweentitania _

_ FireDragon has changed Mirajane’s name to LiteralDemin _

LiteralDemin: *demon

_ FireDragon has changed LiteralDemin’s name to LiteralDemon _

_ FireDragon has changed Gajeel’s name to IronMan _

_ FireDragon has changed Levy’s name to Smartie _

_ FireDragon has changed Wendy’s name to Windy _

_ Windy: owo _

_ FireDragon has changed Juvia’s name to Bubblehead. _

_ FireDragon has changed Carla’s name to CaPpy4life _

_ FireDragon has changed Lily’s name to KiwiKat _

_ FireDragon has changed Laxus’s name to tHuNdErThIgHs _

_ FireDragon has changed Freed’s name to Gay4Laxus _

_ FireDragon has changed Lisanna’s name to Furry _

_ Furry: Seriously Natsu?! _

_ Fire Dragon has changed Evergreen’s name to Mrs.Elfman _

_ Mrs.Elfman: WHAT THE HECK. _

_ FireDragon has changed Bickslow’s name to BabyDaddy _

_ BabyDaddy: o_O _

_ Fire Dragon has changed Elfman’s name to TheREALman _

_ FireDragon has changed Sting’s name to StingyBee _

_ FireDragon has changed Rogue’s name to Emo. _

StingyBee: Wait lemme add 2 more peeps.

_ StingyBee has added Yukino Agria and Minerva Orland to this chat. _

_ StingyBee has changed Yukino’s name to Spiritgirl _

Keygirl: HI YUKINO!

_ StingyBee has changed Minerva’s name to Princess _

_ Ichiya has joined the chat. _

_ Ichiya has changed his name to DirectorIchiya _

FireDragon: Hey peeps!

KeyGirl: Heyyy Natsu!

FreakinElsa: Seriously why did you name me this?

NotAlwaysHappy: LeT iT gO GrAy.

Smartie: Ok what’s this even for? Also Happy are you high?

NotAlwaysHappy: Maybe ;)

kweenTitania: I think its for us mages to bond

Mrs.Elfman: HOW DO I CHANGE MY NAME

kweenTitania: I think it suits you Ever.

Mrs.Elfman: ONLY ELFMAN CALLS ME THAT

theREALman: ITS MAN

kweenTitania: Point proven. Time for cake.

DirectorIchiya: Hello Erzaaaaaaa~

kweenTitania: Oh frickle frack.

KeyGirl: WHO THE HECK ADDED ICHIYA

FireDragon: I didn’t 

BubbleHead: JUVIA DOESN’T KNOW HOW TO REMOVE PEOPLE

FireDragon: NEITHER DO I

kweenTitania:  _ AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA _

SpiritGirl: Well, this is off to a rocky start.

IronMan: NEVER FEAR FOR I AM HERE!

FreakinElsa: I go pee and THIS HAPPENS

Smartie: Looks like he’s gone.

LiteralDemon: WHERE’S JELLAL AND MEREDY? AND CANA?

_ Bubblehead has added Meredy to the chat _

_ BubbleHead has changed Meredy’s name to InMyFeelings _

InMyFeelings: Why hello there.

_ Bubble Head has added Cana to the chat _

_ FireDragon has changed Cana’s name to ForeverDrunk _

_ InMyFeelings has added Jellal to the group _

_ InMyFeelings has changed Jellal’s name to Jellybean _

JellyBean: What. 

kweenTitania: J-jellal

JellyBean: E-Erza

tHuNdErThIgHs: What the frick?

ForeverDrunk: Ooh look! A place where I seem normal sfhikjlms.

BubbleHead: YeEt

CaPpy4life: What’s with my name!

NotAlwaysHappy: CARLA! I KNEW YOU SHIPPED CAPPY!

CaPpy4life: What… Oh.

Cappy4life: F*ck.

Windy: OOH! A GROUP CHAT!   
Windy: *cat.gif*

Windy:*unicorn.gif*

Keygirl: … she’s so pure.

KweenTitania: OK LET’S SET SOME RULES

JellyBean: Agreed.

KweenTitania: 1. DON’T CUSS WHEN WENDY IS AROUND

Windy: STFU. I can cuss if I want to.

KweenTitania: Never mind then.

**KeyGirl liked “STFU. I can cuss if I want to.”**

Windy: Thank you. 

Windy: *happy.gif*

FireDragon: What’s with the moving pictures?

Windy: *theyrecalledgifs.gif*

FireDragon: OwO

FireDragon: *awesome.gif*

Windy: *yay.gif*

FreakinElsa: And we have reached the point where Gray will now mute this chat.

KeyGirl: Wait. Did gray just talk in third person.

LiteralDemon: OMFG YES.

InMyFeelings: GRUVIA

BubbleHead: O-O

BubbleHead: That’s a little bit of an exaggeration.

InMyFeelings: You STALK him.

BubbleHead: HEY! JUVIA DOESN’T STALK!

ForeverDrunk: Yes you do fainlsdc.

**BubbleHead disliked “Yes you do fainlsdc.”**

BubbleHead: 1. Juvia admires from a distance. 2. Cana is drunk

ForeverDrunk: Tell me somethin I don’t kno hun.

KeyGirl: This is getting les AF.

ForeverDrunk: YU GOT A PROBLEM WITH DATgnvlzdc?

KeyGirl: No ma’am.

Princess: Wow. What’s going on.

KeyGirl: Hey minerva!

Princess: Hi Yukino.

KeyGirl: I’m Lucy.

Princess: Whoops. Hi Lucy

SpiritGirl: I’m Yukino hewooo.

Princess: THIS IS CONFUSING WHO NAMED THESE TWO?   
StingyBee: … Natsu.

FireDragon HEYYYYYYY U DID TOO!

Director Ichiya: I smell parfum of Erza.

Princess: How do you boot someone.

_ FireDragon has made this chat private. _

_ FireDragon has booted DirectorIchiya _

kweenTitania: MY SAVIOR!

LiteralDemon: Ship.

kweenTitania: WTF mira.

FireDragon: If you excuse me, I’mma jump off the roof.

BabyDaddy: Why hello there.

Furry: Who are u?

BabyDaddy: I’m your BabyDaddy.

BubbleHead: Juvia’s s h o o k.

KeyGirl: OMFG YES.

FreakinElsa: GET THE GIRL MAN! 

NotActuallyHappy: OOH LOVE.

LiteralDemon: I heard love.

Gay4Laxus: yes cuz I love laxus.

tHuNdErThIgHs: I’m gonna yeet myself onto a highway now.

BubbleHead: Laxus-san, suicide is bad.

tHuNdErThIgHs: yeah, buzz off rainwoman

BubbleHead: WHAT DID YU CALL JUVIA?

InMyFeelings: Shit she’s triggered

ForeverDrunk: Run.

BubbleHead: I’m not triggered.

InMyFeelings: Well whoopsie

Furry: All in favor of changing my name say I

BabyDaddy: I

Furry: Good enough

BabyDaddy has changed Furry’s name to NekoGirl

FreakinElsa: ok thats…

KeyGirl: K I N K Y

BabyDaddy: Das what I’m talking about ;)

SpiritGirl: LUCY!

Princess: SRSLY AM I THE ONLY ONES BOTHERED BY THEIR NAMES.

Smartie: Das my gurlll u go Lu!~

Emo: I’m here. 

StingyBee: Welcome to hell

Emo: Glad to be here

LiteralDemon: STING YOU MADE LAXUS LAUGH

StingyBee: WAIT WHAT

**FireDragon liked WAIT WHAT**

**KeyGirl liked WAIT WHAT**

**LiteralDemon liked WAIT WHAT**

**BabyDaddy liked WAIT WHAT**

**BubbleHead liked WAIT WHAT**

**Windy liked WAIT WHAT**

**IronMan liked WAIT WHAT**

FreakinElsa: Yeah he’s actually laughing.

tHuNdErThIgHs: I’m human. Get over it.

Smartie: Wut.

KiwiKat: Ah that was a nice nap wait what the…

Smartie: LILYYYYYYYYYY!

KiwiKat: hi Levy :)

Gay4Laxus: Ur cute when you laugh.

tHuNdErThIgHs: Laxus.exe has crashed.

LiteralDemon: MINE BACK OFF

BubbleHead: OOH A LOVE TRIANGLE

_ InMyFeelings has added Lyon to the chat _

BubbleHead: Aw f*ck no.

_ InMyFeelings has changed Lyon’s name to FreakinAnna _

FreakinElsa: very funny.

FreakinAnna: I’m the older one. I should be elsa

FreakinElsa: Go ahead.

FreakinAnna: No thanks. You need to let it go.

FreakinElsa: OK NEXT TIME SOMEONE SAYS LET IT GO I WILL ICE-MAKE THEM IN THE FACE

BubbleHead: Let it go.

FreakinElsa: OK ANYONE ELSE

LiteralDemon: But Juvia said it Gray!

BubbleHead: Jes. Juvia did.

KeyGirl: Is she your waifu?

InMyFeelings: GRUVIA!   
BubbleHead: LUCY! MER!

InMyFeelings: Meredy, wrecking havoc on Gruvia and Jerza since x791 lmao. 

KeyGirl: Juvia you know youre his waifu

BubbleHead: …

BubbleHead: Juvia feels pressured

**FreakinElsa has left the group.**

_ KeyGirl has added FreakinElsa back to the group. _

JellyBean: Erza?

kweenTitania: Helloooooo Jellal <3

kweenTitania: WAIT I SWEAR THAT WAS HAPPY!

LiteralDemon: Kiss kiss fall in love!

FireDragon: B O I

Windy: Heck Y E S

NekoGirl: J E R Z A

Princess: S T O P  I T.

Princess: Plus change lucy’s name or something!

_ KeyGirl has changed her name to StarGirl _

_ SpiritGirl has changed her name to YukiYukiLitClub _

StarGirl: Happy?

YukiYukiLitClub: Now we shall resume with the Jerza.    
Literal Demon: OK CONFESS NOW!

KweenTitania: WHAT THE HELL MIRA

Literal Demon: OR I ADD ICHIYA AND NO ONE WILL REMOVE HIM

KweenTitania: You wouldn’t.

StarGirl: agreed.

JellyBean: Do i have no say in this?

LiteralDemon has added Director Ichiya to the chat

Director Ichiya: PARFUM! I KNOW YOU WANT ME ERZA HUNNY <3

KweenTitania: MIRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!

StingyBee: And this, folks is where the world ends. Any comments Rogue?   
Emo: I’m glad to have died at this very important point in history. Oh wait. I’m already dead inside.

BubbleHead: OMFG ROGUE!

**IronMan liked OMFG ROGUE!**

**Smartie liked I’m glad to have died at this very important point in history. Oh wait. I’m already dead inside.**

Smartie: You made Laxus laugh again.

FreakinElsa: Why are you at the guild at two in the morning?

Smartie: WHY ARE  YOU AT THE GUILD AT TWO IN THE MORNING?

BubbleHead: *ominous music*

ForeverDrunk: OK EVERYONE SHUT UP!

ForeverDrunk: ITS TWO  IN THE MORNING, I’M HUNGOVER AND DONT WANT TO DEAL WITH THIS SH*T RIGHT NOW. GO TO SLEEP. YOU CAN DO THIS AFTER YOU SLEEP. FOhns;ca[‘hxnio;jklgfv.

BubbleHead: Ok then, goodnight!

FireDragon: Yeet. GOodnite mofos.

LiteralDemon: UGH. fine goodnight.

InMyFeelings: The Jerza will happen tomorrow.


	2. MiraFraxus and Jerza

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> KweenTitania: It’s noon and no Jerza. I’m saved.  
> LiteralDemon: Yeah right. Confess  
> YukiYukiLitClub: KISS. KISS. FALL IN LOVE.

LiteralDemon: Good morning!

FireDragon: Five more minutes

LiteralDemon: B O I

StarGirl: That’s natsu 4 ya lel.

FreakinElsa: My god I was reading all of the old texts.

Windy: U WERE SO HIGH   
FreakinElsa: UR 13 WENDY HUSH CHILD.

Windy: Jeez ok.

_ Windy has added Romeo Conbolt to the chat _

_ Windy has renamed Romeo to SmolNatsu _

SmolNatsu: owo hewo

FireDragon: Romeo mah boiiii

NotAlwaysHappy: Is carla awake?

CaPpy4life: One sec I’ll change my name.

_ Windy has renamed CaPpy4life to TalkingAngela _

TalkingAngela: Ok fine.

Literal Demon: Erza I know you’re awake

JellyBean: plz no.

BabyDaddy: plz yes.

NekoGirl: Ah it’s time.

BubbleHead: To begin isn’t it?

StingyBee: I get a little bit 

Emo: Bigger but then, I’ll admit

Stargirl: I’m just the same as I was

Windy: Now don’t you understand.

LiteralDemon: I’M NEVER CHANGING WHO I AM

FreakinElsa: Ok I’m gonna go sleep my woes away.

LiteralDemon: It’s Time by imagine dragons = my JAMMMMM

BubbleHead: I thought it would be demons.

StingyBee: *rimshot*

YukiYukiLitClub: morning!

Smartie: You know what’s funny?

Ironman: What is it?

Smartie: How we’re all supposed to be working, but we’re not.

LiteralDemon: I am.

FireDragon: Oh yeah we work!   
Stargirl: -_-

FireDragon: HEYYYYYY LUCE WANNA GO ON A JOB

BubbleHead: OOH LOVE

StarGirl: Yes to natsu, no way to juvia.

BubbleHead: HEY!

InMyFeelings: ERZA!

BabyDaddy: Erza needs to find her daddy:)

JellyBean: *jellal.exe has crashed*

KweenTitania: Oh lord help meh.   
DirectorIchiya: Morning my hunny. Hope you had dreams that are as sweet as u r.

KweenTitania:  _ AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA _

LiteralDemon: huhu.

DirectorIchiya: Oh what such lovely perfume. <3

BubbleHead: HELP!

StingyBee: WUT

Smartie: GAJEEL IS RUNNING INTO ONCOMING TRAFFIC

BubbleHead: JUVIA LILY AND LEVY ARE TRYING TO STOP HIM

KiwiKat: HE’S FREAKIN SONIC MAN

StingyBee: Maybe if you didn’t text while running…

Smartie: Oh. That’s a good idea.

theREALman: SO MANLY

Smolnatsu: So… not you?

FireDragon: O O F

Windy: GOT EM THERE smh

LiteralDemon: I HAVE FOUND YU ERZA

FreakinElsa: S T O P

Princess: Wat’s up bois

BubbleHead: LET IT GO

FreakinElsa: OK IM CHANGING MY  NAME

_ FreakinElsa changed his name to IceMakeGray _

Bubblehead: tbh Juvia liked FreakinElsa better

InMyFeelings: yEeT son.

_ InMyFeelings changed IceMakeGray’s name to FreakinElsa _

FireDragon: *when yur listening to imagine dragons yes feelin  radioactive *

BubbleHead: Yesssss Juvia loves to lie but she’s a  bad liar ಥ ͜ʖಥ

IronMan: YESS YOURE A  NATURAL

Smartie: *yeet  its time for the puns*

Princess: Oh god. I’m going to do  whatever it takes for the puns to stop ಥ ͜ʖಥ

StingyBee: *rimshot*

StarGirl: Eh. OneRepublic is better.

YukiYukiLitClub: Counting Stars is my jam

StarGirl: SAMEEE

TalkingAngela: Gosh I wonder why?

NotAlwaysHappy: the Jinx machine is out of order please insert another quarter

Emo: That’s so random

ForeverDrunk: Y’all are high smh

Smartie: OK WE FINALLY STOPPED GAJEEL

IronMan: ‘Sup.

Emo: How was that death attempt?

IronMan: 10/10 would recommend

BubbleHead: Glad to hear -_-

12:00PM

StarGirl: NATSU IS A DEAD MAN

FireDragon: Wut why?

StarGirl: YOU DESTROYED A CITY

FreakinElsa: Who did you think it was? Yukino?

YukiYukiLitClub: I can destroy a city if I want to.

FreakinElsa: I doubt it.

YukiYukiLitClub: I CAN DESTROY YU IF I WANTED TO

Stargirl: Yu go girl!

**Princess liked Yu go girl!**

KweenTitania: It’s noon and no Jerza. I’m saved.

LiteralDemon: Yeah right. Confess

YukiYukiLitClub: KISS. KISS. FALL IN LOVE.

StarGirl: PfFT

NekoGirl: Gotta love them ships.

BabyDaddy: Yeah where’s the daddy?

NekoGirl: Ur my daddy

LiteralDemon: B I X A N N A

theREALman: Listen up punk don’t hurt my sis.

NekoGirl: -_-

LiteralDemon: SCREW JERZA

JellyBean: *phew*

kweenTitania: WE ARE SAVED

LiteralDemon: SIKE U THOUGHT

tHuNdErThIgHs: Mira has gone crazy banshee. I repeat crazy banshee.

StingyBee: How do you feel rogue?

Emo: Meh. My emotions are far more scary

StingyBee: This has been Rogue’s opinion. Thank you for tuning in.

StarGirl: And Laxus has spit out his beer laughing. I repeat, Laxus has spit out his beer laughing.

ForeverDrunk: WHY WOULD U WASTE UR BEER LIKE THAT

LiteralDemon: Confess and I won’t bug you.

KweenTitania: Why don’t you confess to Laxus? Then we’ll do it.

LiteralDemon: ILY Laxus baby ;)

KweenTitania: She actually did it.

JellyBean: *jellal.exe has crashed*

Gay4Laxus: Hey I love Laxus tooo

tHuNdErThIgHs: Yeah i’m going to go jump off of a cliff now aint that neat.

BubbleHead: What is it with Laxus and depression.

Emo: look at me

BubbleHead: AND ROGUE

**Smartie liked look at me** FreakinElsa: Wait where did Natsu and Lucy go?

Windy: Oh Mavis the spams.

FreakinAnna: JUVIA MY LOVE HELLO

InMyFeelings: No. 

**BubbleHead liked No.**

FreakinElsa: Back off Lyon. She’s not your guild.

LiteralDemon: Ooh Jealous!

FreakinElsa: No one answered my question

BabyDaddy: Ya where did Natsu and Lucy go?

Smartie: OH MY GOD LUCY

IronMan: Levy is fangirling. Like Legit squealing in public.

StarGirl: I was in the bathroom. What’s up

NotAlwaysHappy: WITH NATSU?

StarGirl: EW NO. NATSU’S DRAINING A RESTRAUNT OF ITS FOOD

LiteralDemon: Darnit. BACK TO JERZA THEN

TalkingAngela: S T O P S P A M M I N G   
FreakinAnna: #Endthespammingtoday

DirectorIchiya: Erza hunny, is it true that you love another?

KweenTitania: Laxus, where’s that cliff i can jump off of?

_ tHuNdErThIgHs has shared a location with the group: Nowhere. _

KweenTitania: Frick you..

FireDragon: Ah that was a good meal.

Smartie: WAS LUCY YOUR MEAL

FireDragon: No I had curry.

**StarGirl has left the chat**

_ Smartie has added StarGirl back _

BubbleHead: Lucy shouldn’t deny it. 

Smartie: #Nalusquad.

**BubbleHead liked #Nalusquad.**

**LiteralDemon liked #Nalusquad.**

**FireDragon liked #Nalusquad.**

**IronMan liked #Nalusquad.**

**FreakinElsa liked #Nalusquad.**

**Windy liked #Nalusquad.**

**InMyFeelings liked #Nalusquad.**

**ForeverDrunk liked #Nalusquad.**

**NotAlwaysHappy liked #Nalusquad.**

**StingyBee liked #Nalusquad.**

**YukiYukiLitClub liked #Nalusquad.**

**tHuNdErThIgHs liked #Nalusquad.**

**Gay4Laxus liked #Nalusquad.**

**DirectorIchiya liked #Nalusquad.**

**Emo liked #Nalusquad.**

**BabyDaddy liked #Nalusquad.**

**Princess liked #Nalusquad.**

**NekoGirl liked #Nalusquad.**

**SmolNatsu liked #Nalusquad.**

**KweenTitania liked #Nalusquad.**

**theREALman liked #Nalusquad.**

**JellyBean liked #Nalusquad.**

**Mrs.Elfman liked #Nalusquad.**

**FreakinAnna liked #Nalusquad.**

BubbleHead: see?

StarGirl: Wait. Natsu? You liked it too?

FireDragon: It's a hashtag #yEeT

LiteralDemon: Dense as usual smh

YukiYukiLitClub: Seriously who’s becoming CANON?

LiteralDemon: Jerza

InMyFeelings: YEEEEEEEEE

LiteralDemon: YEEEEEEEEE

KweenTitania: F R I C K

JellyBean: I’m done. Let’s just confess

KweenTitania: WUT NO

JellyBean: I  L O V E E R Z A

KweenTitania: …

LiteralDemon: Y E S

InMyFeelings: ITS CANON

kweenTitania: ILY 2 Jellal

Literal Demon: YES

Smartie: Who just screamed in the guild hall?

FreakinElsa: Mira

Smartie: Seriously Gray you’re everywhere.

FreakinElsa:  ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

FireDragon: ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

Windy: OOH LENNY FACES

Windy: ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

IronMan: ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

StarGirl: ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

Smartie: ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

FreakinElsa: I feel popular

BubbleHead: Cuz u are bby ;) ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

FreakinElsa: ru high

NekoGirl: Bickslow where r u

BabyDaddy: Take a guess

FreakinElsa: EW

BabyDaddy: I’m in the guild

FreakinElsa: oh. I don’t see you.

BabyDaddy: L O O K  U P

Emo: Ah, technology addiction. We’re all going insane ಥ ͜ʖಥ

FreakinElsa: And Laxus is on the floor. I repeat Laxus is on the floor.

LiteralDemon: Aw, he’s laughing <3

Gay4Laxus: Cute.

LiteralDemon: Fight me.

DirectorIchiya: I smell the parfum of a threesome.

tHuNdErThIgHs: EW EW EW EW EW EW EW 

KweenTitania:  _ AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA _ _   
_ LiteralDemon:  _ AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA _

Gay4Laxus: I don’t mind if its just me and Laxus <3

FireDragon: CAN I PLEASE BOOT ICHIYA

Director Ichiya: No. I shall take my leave.

FreakinElsa: H E L P

StarGirl: JUVIA IS HURLING HERSELF OFF OF A BUILDING

BubbleHead: Juvia’s last words: Juvia wishes Ichiya didn’t exist.

StarGirl: There you have it folks.

BubbleHead: owo I survived.

NotActuallyHappy: You didn’t even throw yourself off the building.

FreakinElsa: I stopped her

Smartie: You were just in the guild. How are you on top of a building now.

StingyBee: Boy I’d LOVE to see dis.

Emo: There’s no point

**Smartie liked There’s no point**

**tHuNdErThIgHs liked There’s no point**

thuNderThIgHs: Omg rogue, you and sting are my bois.

10:00 pm

Emo: wait rly? I has friends?

StingyBee: Hey!

**Smartie liked rly? I has friends?**

Smartie:#relatable

Forever Drunk: djdjdvcfemso rogue be thiccc

Emo: back off drunkie

Forever Drunk: well ok then

LiteralDemon: How's my favorite power couple?

Windy: *otp.gif*

LiteralDemon: thank you Wendy.

Stargirl: Yes plz inform the public

JellyBean: y'all are H I G H af

KweenTitania: uhu hi jellybean baby ;)

JellyBean: Er-erza!

KweenTitania: OMIGOSH SRY I need to change my phone password

NotAlwaysHappy: hint it's jellalCakE>

JellyBean: Jellal.exe has stopped working please reboot.

LiteralDemon: Erza!;) Reboot jellal hunny. 

DirectorIchiya: since Erza hunny is taken hello Mira hunny wanna hook up

LiteralDemon:  _ AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA _

Stargirl: I will boot u!

DirectorIchiya: fine :(

KweenTitania: H A P P Y

Smartie: Those are a few of Erza's favorite things

Stargirl: What about Cake ON jellal

Smartie:*gasp* LUCHAN 

ForeverDrunk: K I N K Y

FreakinElsa: Hush puppies

ForeverDrunk: even more kinky smh

FreakinElsa: HOW

FireDragon: wut abt death 

Emo: I think you got Erza mixed up with me.

Stargirl: XD Rogue

Smartie: Yes

Gay4Laxus: Laxus? Also girls, wake up call tomorrow?

Stargirl: YES

Smartie: Y E E T

Gay4Laxus: good nite :)

Stargirl: nite

Smartie: zzzz


	3. 3.Squad Goals and Despacito

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Mrs.Elfman: LEVY STOP IT WITH THE DESPACITO  
> Windy: *noway.gif*  
> kweenTitania: L E V Y S T O P A N D G E T O F F M A G E C H A T

4 AM

Gay4Laxus: Ready?

Stargirl: Hecking yes

Smartie: Me tho XD

Gay4Laxus: DADADADADA

Smartie: Presenting the squad that's smarter than your college professor!

Stargirl: without going to college!

Smartie: with sugar,

Stargirl: spice,

Gay4Laxus: and everything nice (looking at you laxus and Mira ;))

Smartie: we r…

Stargirl: THE BOOKWORM SQUAD

Gay4Laxus: wishing u a good morning. 

LiteralDemon: wut r u doing it's 4 in the morning!

_ Gay4Laxus has changed his name to LoveMirafraxus _

LiteralDemon: Awww freed!

Stargirl: ur ok with being in a love triangle?

LiteralDemon: for the time being. Go back to sleep.

LoveMirafraxus: But Mira!!

LiteralDemon: what?

Stargirl: we're H I G H

Smartie: I'm not. This is when I usually wake up tbh.

LoveMirafraxus: overachiever. 

Smartie: if it's so sad go play despacito or something hun.

LoveMirafraxus: Mira play despacito

BubbleHead: someone please explain to Juvia as to why she was awakened by despacito blasting throughout fairy hills

Smartie: mission accomplished

KweenTitania: L E V Y switch that off!

Smartie: Nah thanks fam.

Windy: D E S P A C I T O

Mrs.Elfman: I’m trying to get my beauty sleep!   
BubbleHead: Oh then you’re gonna have to sleep for a week or somethin honey

Mrs.Elfman: Look at u honey.

StarGirl: Excuse me, Ever. Juvi is flawless.

BubbleHead: TAKE IT IN SWEETIE.

Mrs.Elfman: Are you high

ForeverDrunk: AYYY DESPACITO

ForeverDrunk: QUIT FIGHTING AND DANCE AYYYYY

FreakinElsa: IT. IS. 4AM.

StingyBee: AND YOU’RE PLAYING DESPACITO?!

Smartie: yes

StingyBee: Can i live in Fairy Hills?

Smartie: sry no.

StingyBee: DARN.

Smartie: heh

tHuNdErThIgHs: GO TO SLEEP OR I WILL ELECTROCUTE YOU.

Smartie: Sry girls we can despacito later

tHuNdErThIgHs: Thank you. 4am is not the time for despacito.

Smartie: If it’s not 4am when is the right time?

IronMan: Not 4am.

Smartie: ugh fine.

9AM

FireDragon: JOB TIME   
StarGirl: U KNOW IT

FreakinElsa: I’ll keep u guys updated

KweenTitania: yes I’m leaving my phone behind.

**FireDragon liked** **yes I’m leaving my phone behind.**

 **StarGirl liked** **yes I’m leaving my phone behind.**

 **FreakinElsa liked** **yes I’m leaving my phone behind.**

 **Windy** **liked** **yes I’m leaving my phone behind.** **  
** **NotAlwaysHappy liked** **yes I’m leaving my phone behind.** **  
** **TalkingAngela liked** **yes I’m leaving my phone behind.**

Windy: *ohyeet.gif*

NotAlwaysHappy: AYE SIR

TalkingAngela: The tomcat is not high 4 once.

FireDragon: LETS GO! FIRE!

StarGirl: SPIRITS!

FreakinElsa: ICE!

KweenTitania: REQUIP

Windy: SKY!

NotAlwaysHappy: TOGETHER THESE MORONS ARE…

TalkingAngela: TEAM NATSU!

IronMan: Awww I want a team :(

Smartie: Why not a “team Gajeel”?

IronMan: Yesss thx Lev

Smartie: I’m part of it right? 

IronMan: Ofc

Smartie: yey!

IronMan: And Juvia, Mira and Cana could be in it :)

Smartie: AND LILY

KiwiKat: Agreed

BubbleHead: Juvia gets to be on a team?

ForeverDrunk: hgljidvnkfmgd; OK

LiteralDemon: Sure why not?

IronMan: LET’S GO! IRON!

Smartie: SCRIPT!

BubbleHead: WATER!

LiteralDemon: TAKE OVER!

ForeverDrunk: CARDS! gnlfzdvk. 

KiwiKat: sry what’s my line?

Smartie: Together these morons are…

KiwiKat: TEAM GAJEEL!

StingyBee: Hehe we already have a team! LETSGO! LIGHT

Emo: SHADOW!

Princess: TERRITORY!

YukiYukiLitClub: SPIRIT!

StingyBee: This is where Lector says: Together we’re the Saber Squad

Emo: And Frosch says: Fro thinks so too

BubbleHead: Why aren’t they in the chat?

StingyBee: Too pure for this.

Smartie: Ah i see.

1 PM

FireDragon:What the frick?

StarGirl: Levy’s on a ‘team Gajeel’?

Smartie: Take it in.

ForeverDrunk: This is fun g; mr g.lajbf ;armdfgkldfmv;fklmkln;ml;

JellyBean: I happen to be part of a team.

KweenTitania: Jellal your guild is not a team

JellyBean: Darn

InMyFeelings: O O F

tHuNdErThIgHs: Here I am. 

LoveMirafraxus: LAXUS!!!~

DirectorIchiya: Mira honey, can u go out with me?

LiteralDemon: I can…

tHuNdErThIgHs:wait WHAT

LiteralDemon: but I won’t.

Smartie: Minerva u might wanna teleport Sting Rogue yourself and Yukino here Im about to get on everyone’s nerves.

StingyBee: DO IT MINERVA. DO IT.

Princess: ok gosh. 

YukiYukiLitClub: Oh yay! This will be fun!

Emo: I have no purpose except memes

**tHuNdErThIgHs liked I have no purpose except memes.**

_ Smartie changed Emo’s name to EdgyCatLady _

EdgyCatLady: noice

StingyBee: OMG XD THIS IS AMAZING

YukiYukiLitClub: and I thought Bixlow’s name was funny smh

BabyDaddy: That’s cuz it is.

NekoGirl: Yesssss

FreakinAnna: Can you not?

NekoGirl: Not what?

FreakinAnna: be high. Thanks and good day.

EdgyCatLady: Well, we’re here with Lyon

IronMan: HEYYYYY FAM   
BabyDaddy: L O O K  U P FOR MAVIS’S SAKE

StingyBee: who’s mavis?

YukiYukiLitClub: *Confusion*

Smartie: Hey guys are you ready for this? 

LiteralDemon: I have the speakers

BubbleHead: I have the track ready just give us the go.

StarGirl: Oh no.

YukiYukiLitClub: XD

LoveMiraFraxus: Ohhhhh yesss

FireDragon: Owo

Smartie: Hey @tHuNdErThIgHs is now a better time than 4 am?

tHuNdEr ThIgHs: Wut

Smartie: I’ll take that as a yes. Juvia play it!

BubbleHead: KK!

Smartie: Mira turn it up!   
LiteralDemon: lel ok!

BabyDaddy: L O O K  U P ur next to each other.

EdgyCatLady: End of humanity am I right?

DirectorIchiya: Mira honey, why wasn’t I invited

LiteralDemon: Sorry bish, I’m in a love triangle, move on. 

DirectorIchiya: LUCY HONEY   
Stargirl: 1. Yes Despacito 2.  _ AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA _

Windy: IS THAT DESPACITO I HEAR

FireDragon: YEAAHHHHH

FreakinElsa: @BabyDaddy I  L o o k e d up. Laxus just spit out his beer

ForeverDrunk: seriously Laxus!

BabyDaddy: OMG Gray

SmolNatsu: DESPACITO! HEY JUVIA PLAY KIDS BOP NEXT

BubbleHead: No thanks.

theREALman: D E S P A C I T O

MrsElfman: Shut up you oaf

LiteralDemon: SHIP.

NekoGirl: Bixlow change my name.

KweenTitania: D E S P A C I T O

InMyFeelings: When you walk into your friends’ guild’s to hear Despacito blasting throughout the city and people covering their ears. Poor Cobra.

FireDragon: Cobra’s with you?   
InMyFeelings: No. I got a text saying Despacito is hurting his ears.

tHuNdErThIgHs: HOW LOUD ARE THESE SPEAKERS

JellyBean: Y E S XD

tHuNdErThIgHs: THAT'S NOT AN ANSWERRRRRRRR

FreakinElsa: Guys switch it off Gramps can prolly hear it.

BubbleHead: how do u know gray-sama?

FreakinElsa: ok it’s confirmed. He just broke down the door and is screaming at the top of his lungs right now

BubbleHead: owo

Smartie: IM NOT SWITCHING IT OFF

tHuNdErThIgHs: levy, gramps wants to see u in his office.

Smartie: Mira turn it down.

ForeverDrunk: TURN IT UP

BabyDaddy: L O O K  U P ARE YOU BLIND MIRA IS RIGHT NEXT TO YOU 

FreakinElsa: Seriously Bixlow, you’re in the guild?

BabyDaddy: YES I AM. L O O K U P.

_ BabyDaddy has changed NekoGirl’s name to KittyMama _

KittyMama: Oh lordy.

Stargirl: ERMAGHERD.

FireDragon: EVEN BETTER THAN DESPACITO

theREALman: THAT’S MANLY

smolNatsu: Don’t say anything elfman

LiteralDemon: D A M

**StarGirl liked D A M**

**FreakinElsa liked D A M**

BubbleHead: ...and Romeo is blasting kidsbop

FireDragon: Heck yes.

smolNatsu: U have to bop to Kidzbop

Windy: OH MY GOD YES

TalkingAngela: S T O P  I T U A R E H I G H

StingyBee: Man I love this guild.

Princess: Traitor.

StingyBee: But I love sabertooth too! It’s just that this is freaking hilarious. Oh hey makarov’s back.

Smartie:I’m back! Romeo, master says to turn down the kidsbop

Bubblehead: we didn’t even get any vocaloid in this joint

EdgyCatLady: Y E S

BubbleHead: Romeo TURN UP THE ROLLING GIRL

Smartie: And the rolling girl. Master is reading my texts while I am. He says shut up he has to say something.

FireDragon: N O

Smartie: Fine, he’s giving the announcement from my phone.

Smartie: Listen up children!

Bubblehead: Master you’re a fast texter.

Smartie: PUT THE PHONES DOWN AND SOCIALIZE

FireDragon: BUT MASTER WE ARE SOCIALIZING MORE

Smartie: Ok then. Just switch off the Hatsune Miku

BubbleHead: *gasp* THAT’S KAGAMINE LEN

EdgyCatLady: Wake me up from this terrible dream - Purple Butterfly on your right shoulder by Rin and Len

**tHuNdErThIgHs liked  Wake me up from this terrible dream - Purple Butterfly on your right shoulder by Rin and Len**

Smartie: Sorry. -Master.

IronMan: Ooh shrimp ur a bad girl ;)

FreakinElsa: EW

BubbleHead: I’m a good girl :)

FreakinElsa: …

StarGirl: Ideal W A I F U

BubbleHead: L U C Y - C H A N 

FireDragon: SHE CAN COOK

**FreakinElsa has left the chat**

_ FireDragon has added FreakinElsa back to the chat. _

YukiYukiLitClub: Y E S

FreakinElsa: LUCY YOU ARE H I G H

**BubbleHead liked LUCY YOU ARE H I G H**

tHuNdErThIgHs: Excuse me, where’s today’s daily kys attempt.

FreakinElsa: ….

BubbleHead: H E L P

tHuNdErThIgHs: There it is. What is it?

Bubblehead: GRAY SAMA IS TRYING TO FIND A WOOD CHIPPER TO THROW HIMSELF IN

FireDragon: XD I’ll help 

BubbleHead: G O O D

Stargirl: Squad goals

Smartie: am I the only one who BrOtps navia here

FireDragon: Nope. I do right juvs

Stargirl: go save Gray or something

FireDragon: RITE

IronMan: I brotp gavia

Smartie: Levia is the brotp

StingyBee: It's Stivia

EdgyCatLady: Rovia

Stargirl: Luvia/Jucy is the brotp

ForeverDrunk: Shut up Juvana is goals g rlgkmv

FreakinElsa: I feel left out. Gruvia is a brotp?

LiteralDemon: Did  you just friendzone your waifu?

FireDragon: OK WE SAVED GRAY BUT JUVIA IS TRYING TO FIND THE WOOD CHIPPER   
FreakinElsa: S H O O T

BubbleHead: P R A N K D

Stargirl: Phew.

FireDragon: Yeet Brotp

10:00PM

Mrs.Elfman: LEVY STOP IT WITH THE DESPACITO

Windy: *noway.gif*

kweenTitania: L E V Y  S T O P A N D G E T O F F  M A G E C H A T 

Smartie: Fine. I’ll despacito tomorrow.

BubbleHead: Good night!


End file.
